Love Is An Investment
If you were an investor in a company you would love to gain profits out of your investment, wouldn’t you? but how about if you didn’t, you would at least would like to break even? but if this investment is making you pay something from your pocket with not even a break-even and is bleeding you alive would you remain investing? The answer to such a logical question would be of course not. Then why do we allow ourselves to pay from our pockets when it comes to relationships. Love is like investing in a company. It is a joint agreement to be in it together. It is an investment of our time and our energy. Yet we do not see it like this. We think to love someone unconditionally means we should sacrifice and be willing to do give it our all with nothing in return. That is right but the least we can do is ask to be even in the relationship. Over and over again I see and I have also fallen in a trap of me sacrificing in the name of unconditional love and I find myself investing a headache, heartache, and loss of my authentic self to please, love, and make someone happy. In return, this person is not willing to pick up a phone to call you or ask if you are doing fine or cares about your feelings and ignores you on a daily bases and mistreats you. On the contrary, if you be your authentic self and respectfully speak your mind and they do not even say it bothers them not because you said it in a bad way but because it affects their ego and their lack of self-confidence and starts blaming you for their pain in the name of you loving them unconditionally. This in no way is a relationship, to begin with, regardless of how you feel towards someone.
Always remember this rule I may love you unconditionally, but you must also love me unconditionally and meet me in the middle to break even. You must also keep in mind that you must love yourself unconditionally first and not allow someone to manipulate you and degrade you and then making you feel guilty if you leave cause you did say you had feelings. My question to you is this would they put up with the same? You do know the answer and it is no. On the contrary, they will always find something in you at fault to blame or to hurt or to leave you or block you. Put yourself first and know you can not heal or help or be someone's hero if they are not willing to put in the effort themselves and it is not your journey or responsibility to do so either. We are also not responsible for how they react to things or how things make them feel. We think that if we do that, we love them unconditionally. We also at a lot of times fall in the trap if only I did this or if only I did that he/she would see me as great or would fall for me or realize how much I love them. This will never happen even if I wished so, so many times. Someone who never saw you as great from day one, rarely will they ever see you as so with time, unfortunately. We fall for putting unworthy people on a pedestal because we feel this person has made us great. It was you who was always great, to begin with, but you did not realize it. It was you that allowed this person by your own choice to bring out your true self even if we are not aware of it. Once we realize that no one has it in them to bring the shine in you and once you learn to understand that you can shine on your own with or without someone, will you then understand unconditional love? So, love yourself first and always put yourself on the pedestal first. Do not get me wrong I am not saying do not compromise but what I am saying is not to do it with someone who is not willing to even meet you halfway, to begin with. Always remember how you are an investor in a company it will always make you balanced and not tip the scales in the relationship in the name of loving someone unconditionally. Finally, we can always love someone unconditionally from an extremely far distance. Letting go does not mean you do not love them it just means you love yourself unconditionally first. Until one day you indifference them. It might hurt now but it will hurt more if you lose yourself and must rebuild yourself from all the unbalance in the relationship. Do not feel guilty for the feeling you gave up on someone it is not that at all but it is about putting yourself first. Always keep that in mind while you feel the grief of separation.